Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

Is it helpful to justify the reason for a breakup when ending a relationship?

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

Over-the-counter supplement could prevent heart disease in type 2 diabetes patients - Medical Xpress

I see through liars

I understand how hurricane paths work

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

Thousands of Norwegians mistakenly told they won millions in lottery - CBS News

I have complete contempt for fakery

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I can count

If You Fit Into One Of These 6 Categories, You Should Be Taking Creatine - MindBodyGreen

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I can read

Mondo Duplantis breaks pole vault world record for 12th time - NBC Sports

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

Apple releases new iOS 26 beta 1 build to developers - 9to5Mac

I don’t cotton to rapists

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

What is an easy way to get your driver's license?

I have a reading level above third grade

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

MLB Power Rankings as Juan Soto's Mets Plummet While Rays and Cardinals Surge - Bleacher Report

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I have complete contempt for traitorism

Have you ever secretly watched someone while they were doing something private?

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

Algorithm to analyze smartphone app data can predict MS symptoms - Multiple Sclerosis News Today

I don’t buy bullshit

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

UFC Atlanta predictions - MMA Fighting

I actually pay taxes

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

People Are Reporting A Frightening COVID Symptom Right Now — Here's What To Know - HuffPost

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

9 fruits that are known to flush out toxins from liver and kidneys when consumed daily - Times of India

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

If sea levels were rising, wouldn't the acreage of coastal salt marshes increase? Are they?

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

Aged neurons don’t respond normally to stress: Study - Parkinson's News Today

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that